Consumerism Confusion in the Cereal Aisle

The other day I was strolling down the cereal aisle in a local grocery.  Usually I just head for the section of unsweetened, fiber-rich, "adult" cereals, but a wave of nostalgia came over me and I considered getting one of the cereals I enjoyed as a child. 

Back then it was Wheaties, 40 percent Bran Flakes (my dad’s favorite), corn flakes and Cheerios.

So, I thought to myself, "Maybe a box of Cheerios would be kind of fun to go through. Tasty little O’s and all that."

Being a bit foggy from nostalgia, I was picturing the good ol’ yellow box about ye big.  I found it … amidst a veritable forest of other forms of Cheerios.  No, I don’t mean other forms of tasty little O’s or other forms of oat-based cereals. 

I mean, the beloved box from my (all-too-distant) past was surround by eight — yes eight — different kinds of Cheerios.  That's nine all together!  If you were born before Kennedy was elected this may take a while to sink in, but it is true nonetheless. There are nine different kinds of Cheerios sold. 

Now, I’ll be the first one to admit that I’m not generation x or y person.  I’m more of a generation "why?" person. I’m of the generation that asks questions like "Why do we need nine different kinds of Cheerios?!"

A question I stood asking myself (hopefully not out loud) for a few minutes in the cereal aisle.  The answer’s pretty obvious.  We don’t need nine different kinds of Cheerios.  We want nine different kinds of Cheerios.  How and when that came about is probably not crucial.  It is what it is.

As we head into another election cycle, pundits will bemoan that we have created a culture of conflict; others will lament that our society is racist, sexist, materialistic, etc.  Still others will point to places of corruption, neglect and harm. Piffle! For my money, I’d say there must be something wrong with a people that wants nine different kinds of Cheerios!